Reflections on Day 4: Childhood Studies Moves In and Home

Calm

 

Could I let this feeling of settling in

 

Move slowly in waves

 

To pay attention

 

To daily rythmn. 

 

And the fear

Sickness

“Don’t touch that!”

VIRUS

 

Rings in my head breaking

Into 

Sharp relief

 

When I want to return to steady

Moments

 

And my daughter has attached to me.

 

Like the moss green integrates into tree bark.

 

She climbs on me

Like I am the jungle gym she has missed

From school days

 

She attaches. 

 

I walk into next room and she runs to me

Urgently

Concerned face.

 

“Momma, I’m scared.” 

 

As if my fears

Are this unnamed anxiety that 

Scares her

And she needs to be with me in every moment. 

 

The VIRUS

Becomes the fear in my daughter’s muscles 

Need to be close.  

 

And the trees are in bloom

Pink blossoms

Don’t know there is a virus in our midst. 

 

Multiple realities in our midst.

 

And I am burdened.

 

And choosing to be open

 

To peace feels 

 

Somehow like a betrayal

 

To those who are suffering

 

But I have a choice. 

 

I can feel the pink blossoms

And appreciate my daughter’s

Spinning of stories

Constant stories

Evolve 

Into bowls of milk

And trains from small blue puzzle pieces

And Elsa castle we made from cardboard and blue paint

And sticks

Sticks galore for lasers.

And tents

And houses

And everything our imaginations can spin. 

 

Can I choose this play?

Can I choose this time to pay attention to our bond?

To our creations?

 

It is time to hold multiple realities in respect

And to feel peace

Move through my muscles in waves

To move through my daughter’s muscles in waves.